10 Things Parents Should Never Say to Their Children

AUTHOR: Saad Muzaffar

There's no handbook for parenting, so you will definitely make mistakes, and that's completely normal. However, even if you struggle, some things are too mean to say to your kids. It can leave a lasting impact and can cause a lot of permanent harm to their mental health for years to come.

Table of Contents

1. Don't Blame Your Divorce on Your Child
2. Don't Tell Your Kids To Face Your Fears
3. Don't Say "Having You Ruined My Life"
4. Don't Gaslight Them
5. Don't Tell Them Their Opinions Aren't Valid
6. Don't Threaten To Send Them To Foster Care
7. Don't Scare Your Kids With Scary Stories
8. Don't Body Shame Them
9. Don't Tell Them To Pay Bills for Privacy
10. Don't Tell Them They Can't Be Stressed
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1. Don't Blame Your Divorce on Your Child

Woman talking to kid — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

The worst thing you can tell your impressionable child is that you and your partner divorced because of them. Not only is this unfair to them, but it will make them blame themselves for the rest of their lives, leaving scars that will take an eternity to heal.

During these times, you must shower your children with love to let them know that splitting up doesn't mean you don't love them.

2. Don't Tell Your Kids To Face Your Fears

Mother advicing kid — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

A sign of toxic parenting is making your kids do your dirty work. For example, don't tell them to face the landlord when you can't afford to pay the rent. It's not their duty or responsibility — it's yours. So you should own up to it. And if times are tough, you can be honest with them instead of playing games that cause them anxiety.

3. Don't Say "Having You Ruined My Life"

Woman shouting at daughter — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Young children need love and support from their parents, and if you're going around saying they ruined your life because they were doing something minor like texting all day, it's one of the most terrible things you can do. Instead, control your anger and calmly make them understand what you mean. You're the adult, and you should act like one.

4. Don't Gaslight Them

Mother and her daughter — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Whatever you do, don't gaslight your children into believing something you said or did never happened. Your youngster shouldn't be sitting there wondering what on earth they did wrong. It's common for parents to tell their kids they deserve it even if it does happen, which is even worse.

5. Don't Tell Them Their Opinions Aren't Valid

Upset kid with mother — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Hearing your parents say that your opinions aren't welcomed burns out that fire inside you. You're afraid to speak up and give your input and thoughts to any conversation for the rest of your life. Make your children feel heard instead of shutting them down every time.

6. Don't Threaten To Send Them To Foster Care

Threatening kid — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

If your child is misbehaving, instead of throwing around insults that will get ingrained into their mind, you should try an alternate parenting method. Telling them that you're going to disown them and put them in foster care is entirely uncalled for; your kid deserves better.

7. Don't Scare Your Kids With Scary Stories

Telling story to kid — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

As your child is growing up, to try to reinforce house rules, make them behave politely, or even get them to eat their leafy greens, we conjure bizarre stories to try to scare them into submission. What this does is create phobias that can be very damaging to their mental health.

8. Don't Body Shame Them

Fat kid being sad — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Picking at kids' insecurities makes them 10 times worse because you're reinforcing what they already believe to be true. A lot of young people face severe body dysmorphia, and shaming them for how they look makes them feel insignificant and unlovable. A healthy diet is essential, but also, let kids be kids.

9. Don't Tell Them To Pay Bills for Privacy

Everyone needs some personal space, and invading their boundaries is something you should always be careful of. You must avoid saying things like they need to start earning for having privacy because that sets a terrible precedent. Don't barge into their rooms if they need alone; they'll come around.

10. Don't Tell Them They Can't Be Stressed

Mother talking to kid — Image Credit: Shutterstock.

When you're young, your problems seem like the end of the world. Even if they might seem petty to you, telling them they can't feel their emotions leads to suppression. It makes it difficult for them to express themselves. Kids can be stressed, too.

Source: Reddit.